At the foot of the Cross

When I was younger, I often found myself at the foot of the cross. It was easier to come and talk to You and not a day went by without me doing so. But today, things are not the same and I find myself too absorbed with various preoccupations. I have begun to define my days by appointments, meetings, and various other occupancies, that have led me to forget my ultimate purpose in life. I have gotten too occupied with my job, exams, and friends that I’ve forgotten to raise my heart to you, even if it’s for a single minute. Prayer has becomes obsolete and the amount of time spent reading the scripture continues to diminish. I was once told that this world was not my home, nor my comfort, nor my shelter, but I keep forgetting.

The flame that used to burn in me with passion for Your word has dwindled as I roam hopelessly. I thought I could do it all on my own and I took credit for way more that I deserved. I considered myself infallible in all that I have done and have forgotten the countless number of times You’ve held my hands and helped me cross the troubled waters. I’ve forgotten the countless times that I’ve fallen, and You my Lord have picked me up. I’ve forgotten the nights spent in worries and tears, as You comforted me with faithful promises. In my false sense of strength, I was made weak.

At times it feels as if I’m missing a piece of me, and that piece is your role in my life. When I find myself in troubled waters, I panic. But you’ve promised me much, and I have given You little. You said “And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope.” (Romans 5:3-4) So, I’ll sit at the foot of the cross asking you to grant me perseverance. Allow me to be steadfast in my faith, and during times of tribulations. Allow my character to reflect Your grace, Your image, Your likeness and Your love. Finally, give me the hope that no matter how many times I will fall, you will always lift me up.

And so, I come to you like I did when I was much younger, kneeling at the foot of the cross and asking for Your grace. You’ve said to me My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor 12:9) Truth is, I can’t do it all on my own and without your blessing. Humble me and allow me to be weak so that in You, I may find strength.